"Like Butterflies Landing On The Hearts of Babies"

I received this delightful video via electronic mail from my dear friend Kristy Uzelac. As many of you know, I hold a special place in my heart (since kindergarten--Tyler Wardall) for Asians.

Proof:

In fifth grade, during my "Japanese phase", I was a Geisha for Halloween and my "boyfriend" that year was Japanese-American. Oh! and there was that one time I dated and almost married a Laotian.... :)

Who doesn't like butterflies and babies?

P.S. In case any of you were wondering, I'm doing much better this week than last...just as predicted. At least I'm consistent!

In every girl there is a little "crazy"...here's mine

Today is one of those days I'm really glad boys don't read my blog and is another one of those days I really "dislike" being a girl.

One word...actually, a combination of two.....HORMOTIONAL.

Hate it. Right now as I sit on my bed, all I want to do is go to sleep and wake up in a different place, different time, different body....anything, just different. I'm not sure exactly what any of that means, but if I could describe the feeling it would be this:

Imagine just unzipping yourself. Unzipping the drab, worn out, blah, sort of "dragging-your-feet-because-you-feel-the-weight-of-the-world-on-your-shoulders" you, and then stepping out of that old skin a new, vibrant, sort of "whistling-a-happy-tune-spring-in-your-step" you. Sounds wonderful doesn't it?

My very wise, big sister Katie once expressed that there must be some purpose for Heavenly Father allowing us [women] to endure being hormotional. I believe he would never make us suffer for no reason. Perhaps it's part of what happened when Eve ate the forbidden fruit in the Garden of Eden...not only will fruit no longer spontaneously grow, there will be noxious weeds, AND every 28 days you will feel as though you've lost your mind! Perhaps it's another lesson in humility, a not-so-subtle reminder of how much we need Him. In any case, I clearly haven't learned whatever it is that I need to learn and it's driving me bonkers.

I find myself keenly aware of my insecurities. I find my mind filled with thoughts about my looks, or work, or boys, etc. Last month it was politics! I mean, really? Whatever it is, I feel terribly insecure about it and almost can't think of anything else. Am I the only one this happens too?

What's really bothering me this time is this...

I went on a blind date with a really cute guy last night. Did the post-date-text thing (which I NEVER do). Regret it. Saw him at a wedding reception tonight. Talked to him. Felt like a foreigner in my own body. Spent the entire drive home trying to stifle all the negative thoughts involving why this cute guy would never like me anyway (enter insecurities)....yada, yada, yada.

Bottom line: I'm exhausted! and SO BUGGED because I know perfectly well that in a week, I'm....gonna...feel....fine. In the meantime, I apologize for my rantings.

I understand if I don't hear from any of you until next Weds.

Thrillingly Uncharted Gravity

Ever fanatsize about what kind of music video you would make if you had the chance? I do. I would definitely ask Sara for her recommendations. Why you ask?

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B: (Do not skip this one because there is no cute video box! Try to name all of the cameos in this video. It's FUN!)

http://www.vevo.com/watch/sara-bareilles/uncharted-directors-cut/USSM21001934

If I could find some way to combine the two of these videos with "Thriller" I think I'd have the perfect music video! :)

OR find some way to incorporate Legos... (skip to 2:17, that's my favorite part)

Oscar--lest we forget!

I watched the Oscars last night. The glitz and glamour were missing ONE thing....God. Not one acceptance speech (at least that was aired) gave any recognition to a Higher Being. Coincidence?

I didn't know this until tonight, but the phrase "Lest we forget" comes from a poem written by Rudyard Kipling (circa 1897) called, "Recessional". In light of the Oscars I found Mr. Kipling's poem quite appropriate...(italics added for emphasis):

God of our fathers, known of old—

Lord of our far-flung battle line—

Beneath whose awful hand we hold

Dominion over palm and pine—

Lord God of Hosts, be with us yet,

Lest we forget—lest we forget!

The tumult and the shouting dies—

The Captains and the Kings depart—

Still stands Thine ancient sacrifice,

An humble and a contrite heart.

Lord God of Hosts, be with us yet,

Lest we forget—lest we forget!

Far-called our navies melt away—

On dune and headland sinks the fire—

Lo, all our pomp of yesterday

Is one with Nineveh and Tyre!

Judge of the Nations, spare us yet,

Lest we forget—lest we forget!

If, drunk with sight of power, we loose

Wild tongues that have not Thee in awe—

Such boastings as the Gentiles use,

Or lesser breeds without the Law—

Lord God of Hosts, be with us yet,

Lest we forget—lest we forget!

For heathen heart that puts her trust

In reeking tube and iron shard—

All valiant dust that builds on dust,

And guarding calls not Thee to guard.

For frantic boast and foolish word,

Thy Mercy on Thy People, Lord!

Amen.

Coincidence?

Like Riding A Bike

As you may have noticed, it's been over a year since I posted last. What's even funnier is that my last post was all about Facebook and it's hypnotizing power that pulls you in. Yes, it certainly has bewitched me the last year...make that two years (yikes!). I'm happy to report that in the meantime I have successfully developed a "healthy" relationship with Facebook and am ready to enter the "blogosphere" again. :)

You may have also noticed the "face lift" my blog has received. Books! I'm not really known for my love of books. Those who know me well can vouch for that....Allison, BriAnne, Lyd, Nat, etc. In fact, in the 9th grade I was grounded for an entire month because it took me that long to read Little Women. Fortunately, I have since overcome my A.D.D. toward books and have become, what I like to call, a "born-again reader". I still don't read as often as I like, but I now consider reading a leisurely pleasure instead of cruel and unusual punishment :) Hence, my choice of decor is to hopefully encourage me to keep reading! (Not to mention it makes me look smarter and feel more intelligenty)

AND, since I have such a "serious" and grown up blog template I thought I should have a "serious" picture....serious people don't smile. On the other hand, I don't want to seem like a bore, so I went with sunshiney-golden-yellow for my blog title background. Now then, don't you feel warm and fuzzy all over?

Sigh. It feels good to be back....like riding a bike.

Nat, this one's for you!

It has been so long since I've posted that I almost wasn't able to access my blog account. To all of my faithful blog followers, I am deeply sorry. What's to blame for my absence from the blogging world....well there are several reasons (you know, the usual) um.....Christmas, spending New Years/Grand Targhee with intellectuals, work, a Bar Mitzvah, training for a half marathon, planning a cruise, being anxiously engaged in the engagement process, etc. But I would have to admit, the reason for lack of posting could be summed up in one word--Facebook.

Lydia once described the appeal of Facebook as "instant gratification!" I wouldn't hesitate to say that she's quite right. It's quick and easy. I only have to post my status (that's thinking of only one witty or thought-provoking thing to say); that's IF I want to say anything at all. People request your "friendship" and "write on your wall." For a brief moment, and I mean brief, you feel really important. In all honesty, it's very reminiscent of Jr. High and High School. It's pretty fun! Now, having said that, it's been a couple months since I joined and it's starting to lose that shiny, new feeling (which isn't necessarily bad). That exciting feeling comes and goes, but ultimately, I try not to waste too much time checking my profile, writing on walls, and such anymore.

I definitely believe that there are many positive uses for Facebook AND blogs! My fear, however, is that I will become too consumed in this electronic "reality" and miss out on what's happening in my TRUE reality. I'm single! I'm young! I'm done with school--I WANT TO LIVE IT UP! There are places to go, people to meet, food to try.... I suppose this blog and Facebook is where I can document said experiences and share them with all of you. Hmmm.

Why is it so hard for me to do... actually sitting down and posting? Is it that I prefer actual human contact, talking to someone in person, or hearing some one's voice on the end of the line? or am I just lazy? Many people describe their blog as their journal. I can relate to that. Clearly my blog posts are not entirely what a formal journal entry would contain. Maybe, I don't post because I feel I should be writing in my "real life" journal instead.

Does anyone else worry that they don't listen as well as they use to? or know how to carry on a conversation with a person face to face? Sometimes I feel like such a goof. I know exactly what to say, as long as it's in "text" form, or "wall" form, or "comment" form; but coming up with something to say on the spot stumps me.

This has become a most random post. It's nothing like I thought it would be in the beginning. I don't even know if there is point to this post...maybe I just needed a moment to reflect (sounds very journally, don't you think?)

At least I can say that I posted!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Today is the day that we give thanks! There are many things I am deeply grateful for and I thank Heavenly Father for them everyday! There is always room in the world for gratitude.

Today is also a day full of tradition. Who doesn't LOVE tradition?

Today, my family strayed from tradition a bit and instead of sitting down and enjoying a "made-from-scratch" Thanksgiving meal, my parents and all the "unwed" children of the family (there are 3 of us) attended dinner at a restaurant....The Gray Cliff Lodge in Ogden Canyon. I'd give it 3 1/2 out of 5 stars. It was pretty good! Way better than the time we had Thanksgiving at Zions Lodge in Southern Utah when I was 12. It was nice not to have the stress or clean up of a Thanksgiving at home. However, nothing beats my mom's stuffing and yams, dad's turkey and mashed potatoes, and Grandma Taggart's rolls. The leftovers will be greatly missed (sniff). There's always next year.

Today we reinstated one of my favorite Thanksgiving traditions...GOING TO THE MOVIES. It started the year "Tremors" came out. Funny movie to see on Thanksgiving, right? Everyone left me at home sleeping and I woke up when they got home (I was totally jipped). Every year after that, the whole fam (including extended family) would go see the most recent Disney flick. The tradition seemed to dwindle the last few years, but not this year. The 5 of us that were home went to the movies !

We saw "The Boy In The Striped Pajamas". Amazing! See it! It definitely reminded me of my many blessings and that I should be truly grateful.

With that, I am grateful for you!